Steps Adults and Children Can Take To Cope With Divorce
When parents make the decision to divorce, it can be a confusing and stressful time for the entire family. The adults often have a difficult time sorting through the legal matters and logistics involved with this major life change, while children face confusion, frustration and sometimes feel as if they are to blame. In some instances, divorce takes a long time to sort through, especially when there is conflict surrounding the decision to separate or legal quarrels regarding custody arrangements, property distribution and financial matters. With this conflict comes an increased level of stress and confusion for the entire family, leading to strong emotions of disappointment and anger.
For children, negative feelings surrounding marital problems are not always expressed in words. Many children will begin to display behavioral problems, acting out at home and in school. Some might lose interest in favorite activities, while others might absorb themselves in outside activities in order to avoid spending time with their family unit. A child’s grades might suffer, reoccurring nightmares may arise and they could possibly become aggressive toward siblings, friends, teachers and other supportive relatives.
Parents can assist children with this time of transition by making attempts to work through their marital problems before deciding to separate. Opening lines of communication, utilizing active listening skills and trying to understand the other person’s point of view are a good starting point for compromise, and these actions can go a long way toward promoting healing. Even when legal separation is the final outcome, explaining the situation to the children and helping them to understand that nothing is their fault will make the transition easier and allow for decreased feelings of pain, anger and anxiety. Finally, parents should strive to remain supportive of their children and the relationship children have with their other parent. This is important because it is statistically proven that children with a high level of support process family changes with a greater level of ease than children lacking support.
In addition to working through problems at home and opening up lines of communication with everyone involved in the divorce proceedings, family therapy can be beneficial. Through our therapy sessions, I can provide adults and children with support and direction. In addition, I can give everyone in the family the opportunity to open up about their feelings in a safe, protected setting. This can reduce both stress and confusion, and that will go far toward eliminating some of the behavioral problems your children might be experiencing. Finally, as a therapist, I can act as an addition to your support system in a neutral, unbiased way, encouraging you to work through your problems and find a state of happiness once again.
If you are in the process of separating from your significant other and there are children involved, turn to family therapy for support. Together, we will find your family’s path to healing, promoting improved psychosocial and physical health for every member of the family and allowing opportunities for a better tomorrow. Visit my contact page to request an appointment or receive more information about me and my practice.
